Tuesday, March 24

You are dead to me!

Fess up. Was it you?

Somebody told Arnica, "hey, if you liked the movie, Juno, you will love the movie, Smart People."

Really? If Arnica liked a movie about an unwed mother addicted to Big-Gulps, he would like a movie about pathetic "smart" people with depressing lives, just because both movies shared one actress? Really?

Here is Arnica's synopsis of the movie. Dennis Quaid plays a widowed English professor jumping back into the dating scene. First of all, Dennis Quiad playing a professor is like Arnica Montana playing Jazz. It sounds like a good idea on paper, but the artist's lack of talent will become apparent in mere seconds. Jessica Parker's mole plays an ER doctor who had a school girl crush over Quaid in college (ya, that could happen). Parker's mole treats Quaide after an accident, Quaid asks her out, they date, they talk, other things happen, Arnica falls asleep. Quaid has two kids. They suck. He has a brother who sucks slightly less than the kids do.

Boring. Boring. Boring.

So, was it you? Did you recommend that "movie" to Arnica? If so, you owe Arnica $2.50 and two hours of his time. You can come by this weekend, and paint Arnica's door, or mow his lawn, or wax his back, or massage his corns—to give back that time that was stolen from him.


Anonymous said...

I just saw "Juno" courtesy of the Seattle Public Library, and, maybe because it was free, I liked it; I think I would have liked it even if I had paid 2.50 for it. I even cried, cause I am a sappy, silly girl. Thanks for the tip, I will avoid the next crappy movie. Please keep sharing.

Arnica Montana said...

you are welcome. and i will. what is your real/fake name?